Somedays we have it, somedays we don’t. This winter has been a tough one with my husband (who doubles as my bestie, sounding board and voice of reason) working out of province during our most gruelling of hockey season’s yet. I am just bouncing back from a 2 week hiatus from the gym, my diet plan and social media in order to get my head back together. I cannot lie, there were days when it took everything to get out of bed and get to work on time, cook dinner and get the boys to the rink. Every single thing inside me was hurting, my mind, my heart and even my bones. Daily tears from either the emotional distress or the physical pain and sometimes both. What triggered this? I am not sure. I assume the stress of life caught up to me and kicked me in the ass as warning to slow down. Where do I go from here? The only way is up. A little less than 12 weeks out from my competition I feel confident I can put in the work to get me to the stage again. The boys have had a great run with play-offs and they each still have a tournment before the post season fun starts. All of which I am excited for. For the record, I did not jump back in full tilt at the gym, instead I pushed through my workouts, lifting a little heavier than usual and I am slowly adding in my cardio. I have been back to eating on plan which has been key to my emotional state I really believe. Fuelling my body with proper nutrition it needs and even though I really do love cookies, I have not given into the cravings. I watched the full season of Dirty John, read and enjoyed the magazines that were piling up on my coffee table, enjoyed nightly soaks in the hot tub to try to ease my tired muscles, ate way to much sinful food and slept. Alot. I actually enjoyed that downtime and I refuse to beat myself up because I fell off the fit bus. I fell but I got back up. And when I got up I started looking for all the things that I am grateful for and in those things found my real motivation. The truth is as much as I love Insta, it wasn’t from those women I admire and follow with the stellar bods that got my ass off the couch. Hell no, it was all around me all along. I actually think the boys enjoyed having me slow down and not buzzing around the house all night long. My husband sent me flowers. I had a good talk with my mom. I did things I never have time for and I did nothing at all. Baby steps momma, baby steps. I know, I know, nothing ever happens until you move outside your comfort zone but you still need to listen to your body. Really listen. Not to the voice that is telling you there are cookies in the cupboard and a pail of ice cream in the freezer with your name all over it. But listen to the voice that tells you to turn off the tv and get to bed, that you need fuel to function, that you need to drink way more water and way less coffee. (ok the coffee part may be pushing it as I love coffee) But you get the drill right?